Miller Morning Madhouse S2E4: Born on the 3rd of July...
All you guys do is just sit up there
Speaker 2:and talk about how fucking cool you are.
Speaker 3:WSBR Super Beach Radio, the best station Pancake and the scramble. Audio breakfast with your favorite guys.
Speaker 4:Hey. Hey. Pancake here with another Sun Fried episode of the Miller morning madhouse. Today, I am joined by Josh Scramble and Elizabeth Benedict. This week, we're gonna break down a little fight that popped off just before the fourth.
Speaker 4:Things got a little wild, and someone's sandal is still up in the ceiling fan. Then we're gonna dive into the fourth of July. Do a little recap there. Fireworks, Barefoot Chaos, and one rookie who almost didn't make it. Here's a pro tip.
Speaker 4:The fourth and Miller is not for first timers. It's not for first time drinkers. It's like putting a t ball kid up against Major League heat. Thankfully, our bikini clad mom squad MVPs were on duty and saved the day and the dude. So grab something cold and enjoy the show.
Speaker 4:We are sponsored today by socoolshirts.com where the shirts are questionable and so I don't know. Anyway, go to showsocoolshirts.com and get a shirt. It helps the show. So welcome back. We're back.
Speaker 5:We're back.
Speaker 4:To the Miller Morning Madhouse. My name is Jerry Pancake,
Speaker 5:Joshua David Scrembo,
Speaker 6:and Elizabeth Benedict.
Speaker 4:Alright. We have Elizabeth back. Been a while. It's been a while. Where have you been?
Speaker 6:I'm happy to be back. Michigan for a very long time, but I'm happy to be back.
Speaker 4:Alright. Michigan. Where do you go in Michigan?
Speaker 6:Frankfurt.
Speaker 4:I have been there with you guys. I have not.
Speaker 6:Know. I'm so yeah. We haven't
Speaker 5:been there period. Not I'm not, like, calling you out or anything. I'm just I've never been there.
Speaker 6:You're fine if you were. No. We I've been there for I think I've spent at least a month there this whole summer. We're going back with the kids for, like, a whole week. Yeah.
Speaker 6:Nice. But yeah. But I missed all of fourth of July.
Speaker 5:Oh. I don't know if you missed it.
Speaker 4:Mean, are you
Speaker 6:Fourth of July here.
Speaker 4:Were you did you feel like, did you have FOMO?
Speaker 6:Oh, I was definitely curious about what was you know?
Speaker 5:It was hot. I could tell you.
Speaker 4:Hot. It was fuck.
Speaker 5:Like, we didn't even go down for half the day. Like, we had we had the it was the longest golf cart kid bike car fourth of July parade in history. Lasted like
Speaker 6:Fifty five.
Speaker 5:Eight minutes, which is like Twelve. It was twelve minutes.
Speaker 4:Twelve? Wow. Well, you know, Bob goes very slow, and he almost hit that rock again. Yeah. Like, very close.
Speaker 6:I remember that.
Speaker 5:Well, so afterwards, I was returning people to their homes and I saw Jerry at a friend's house, and they offered me Mimosa, and I'm like, why not? And as we were there, Bob almost hit the rock again.
Speaker 4:Like, he was Within inch or inch? Inches, maybe? I don't know. Yeah. It was very close.
Speaker 5:Of us, so we couldn't tell And
Speaker 4:he was just like not looking again, and waving at people.
Speaker 5:There was no one in the street. Thank God.
Speaker 4:Yeah. There was no kids behind him on bikes.
Speaker 6:Was that's that's what I'm remembering. Right?
Speaker 4:And Derek trying to start a fight with him. What?
Speaker 6:And but then he he did handle it well once he calmed down, I think. Right? It was
Speaker 4:I mean, it he reversed really fast and almost hit the kids on the bikes, and then Derek got really mad. Our friend Derek What? What's his last name? Derek what's it? D
Speaker 5:Doily? Derek Doily? No.
Speaker 4:What's a breakfast what's a d word? A breakfast d word?
Speaker 6:Devil Donuts.
Speaker 4:Donut. Derek Donut. That makes him sound fat, though. Donuts are Derek Doughnuts.
Speaker 5:Derek Doughnut hole?
Speaker 6:What about deviled eggs?
Speaker 5:Not
Speaker 4:really breakfast, but hey, it's a it's a fourth
Speaker 5:of
Speaker 4:July themed thing. They probably had deviled eggs somewhere, not anywhere I went, unfortunately.
Speaker 6:Bet someone's able to give us a really good one right now that we can't think of.
Speaker 5:I'm sure there's why can we not think of a d breakfast?
Speaker 4:Call us (219) 200-4280 and give us a name for Derek. Is breakfast related. Derek Tyson also, if you really wanna Oh, yeah. He did punch someone.
Speaker 5:Rightfully so, though. They they definitely earned it.
Speaker 6:Did we go over that?
Speaker 4:That guy punched a girl.
Speaker 5:He did
Speaker 6:that too.
Speaker 5:Oh, yeah. So that was just before July 4, wasn't it?
Speaker 4:Yeah, it was. It was. So it's been very
Speaker 6:don't know that guy.
Speaker 4:No. No. That's good. It's been very hot here and
Speaker 6:Like warm?
Speaker 4:When it gets hot yeah. Like warm and hot. And like when it gets hot, people will get cranky and
Speaker 5:Isn't it proven like the crime rate goes up for every degree over like 90
Speaker 6:Florida.
Speaker 5:Well, Chicago. Like, I remember in the mid nineties, they used to say, like, for every degree over 90 it gets, like, the crime rate jumps two points or something.
Speaker 4:That's crazy. I believe you.
Speaker 5:I mean, I don't remember the exact statistics, but do you remember, like, they had that dangerous in the mid nineties that was like 98 degrees for a week straight, and it killed a bunch of people? Yeah. The crime rate also, like, went off the chart that week because people were just, like, pent up because they couldn't cool down pretty much. Like, they didn't know outlet, so they just like
Speaker 4:Yeah. So it's like that movie, The Son of Sam, which was like New York City. I forgot about was a heat wave, and like no one had fucking air conditioning, and like, then that guy was murdering a bunch of people. Anyway. Yeah.
Speaker 4:So when things get hot, like, the tempers start to flare, and apparently, this was, I don't know, maybe a couple weeks before the that long. Maybe a week week the weekend before the fourth. Things were getting crazy.
Speaker 6:When it happened? Because I remember seeing
Speaker 5:All the police. Fix police
Speaker 6:cars, and they were
Speaker 4:just Which is the biggest police response in the history of Gary in Indiana.
Speaker 6:That's why I was so concerned. Yeah. I was like like, something must have been on fire.
Speaker 5:Domestic not domestics. We shoot. This was a bar dispute, so that gets more attention than anything. Like, if you break into people's cars, the
Speaker 4:or even shoot two people and murder one of them, you're not gonna get six cops there.
Speaker 5:That doesn't matter, but, you know, God forbid, we'd not bring up this bar fight.
Speaker 4:Don't soil the flamingo, sir. We will send all of our we'll send a tank if you soil the flamingo.
Speaker 5:Do you think, like, Nick has a bat phone in the back of the flamingo?
Speaker 4:He does. He has one of those red phones like that, but it's red, and it just goes straight to the mayor.
Speaker 6:Yeah. Who do know
Speaker 5:who called
Speaker 6:the police when that happened?
Speaker 4:I don't know. Probably someone in the bar since it's all, you know, God love everybody that works there, but they're all women. So, like, apparently, what had happened What? Was that one of our friendly neighborhood bartenders there threw ranch dressing on a customer because he was being an idiot and drunk. And so I heard this part.
Speaker 5:Nor did I.
Speaker 4:Yeah. There was some ranch. I think it was ranch. It might have been like Hidden Valley. It might have been French or whatever.
Speaker 6:Because that stains.
Speaker 4:And so the guy got really mad and then started throwing stuff around in there, and then he hit one of our neighbors, who a fella, and that that particular fella didn't really respond. He got hit pretty good and just
Speaker 5:Just took it.
Speaker 4:Just took it, I guess.
Speaker 6:That's how it should go.
Speaker 4:And then the guy went outside and he was Alright.
Speaker 6:That's understandable. I I deserve that.
Speaker 4:Rummaging through the like, throwing all the outside furniture, you know, on that side part.
Speaker 6:Mhmm. Temper tantrum.
Speaker 4:Yeah. Just throwing everything, throwing umbrellas, whatever. Jeez. I didn't hear him. And then one of the Miller all stars, Ashley, he hit her in the face, like, just straight in the face, because she's trying to calm him down.
Speaker 4:Then our Derek Donuts
Speaker 6:Is she okay? Like, did she
Speaker 4:Laid him out with one punch, and then apparently, neighbor just really laid into him once he was, like, on the ground.
Speaker 6:I'm so happy that Derek did that.
Speaker 5:Derek to the rescue.
Speaker 4:I mean, yeah, that was very classy, and we commend you, and you'll be getting a award from the so cool or the Miller Morning Man House.
Speaker 5:You know?
Speaker 4:Sorry. So cool podcast, Miller Morning Man House.
Speaker 6:Like that. I don't I I always think, what would I do in that situation? And I
Speaker 5:I know you, and I think you just freeze up.
Speaker 6:I just completely freeze up.
Speaker 5:No offense. This is No.
Speaker 6:I just No. I I'm glad that that was my answer though because
Speaker 5:Yeah. Like, I could just imagine you just look a shock just like
Speaker 6:Well, I need like a lot of time to process something.
Speaker 4:So, like, I would be good for one punch, but then I would be running out of there because, like, I would be worried. Always have this thing where like, I get in a fight, and then it's like one guy, and I think I can like do pretty well against one guy, but then like
Speaker 6:The friends.
Speaker 4:The friends all end up joining in, and like the one time
Speaker 5:You're like that guy in the dazed and confused when he's like, all I need to do is get one good punch and then get the shit kicked out.
Speaker 4:Yeah. And I just got the shit kicked out of me like every time where it's like, oh, man, I'm gonna have to go back and like seek revenge later because these guys really fucked me up. So anyway Yeah.
Speaker 6:His reaction was just, I think, really impressive.
Speaker 5:But what I heard also is the reason there were so many cops is someone claimed that he had a gun, and that's what brought out all the cops.
Speaker 4:So what happened is the guy got beat up pretty bad, and he left, but then he came back with friends, and supposedly, they were armed, and that's when the but like so this just
Speaker 5:how looking?
Speaker 4:Yeah. They so Derek slipped out when he saw them come back into the bar because he's like, they're probably looking for me.
Speaker 6:That's smart.
Speaker 4:And they were like
Speaker 6:You know, I can knock
Speaker 4:on Our friend got fucking jumped in here by white guys and we're looking for him. Yeah. So that was, you know, a big hullabaloo, and supposedly, they arrested someone. I don't believe that at all. I but
Speaker 5:I'm just looking like, can you imagine the conversation this guy, like, goes up to his friends? Hey, man. I need you to come help me out. What happened? So I hit this woman in the face, and then I got my ass kicked.
Speaker 6:I'm sure he did not mention this.
Speaker 5:No. But I mean
Speaker 6:What? What the
Speaker 4:So and also, like, it just shows you so we've been talking about this for a bit, Jen, Pancake, and I, that there's a wide spectrum of alcoholism here. Like, it's just everyone's on it on the spectrum of alcoholism. But some people are, you know, more No. Spectrum y. I mean, they're other people.
Speaker 4:They're small
Speaker 5:stars for sure.
Speaker 4:And so the reaction of some of the people that are heavy on this on this spectrum to the soul because I would have left. Like, if I was in there drinking and all this shit happened, I would have been like, I'm getting the fuck out of this place. Fuck. I'm probably not gonna come back for a while.
Speaker 6:Yeah. I don't wanna get, like,
Speaker 5:a sign punch bag. These things kinda start happening. I give a look like, alright, finish the cocktails because we're leaving in
Speaker 4:sixty We're getting the fuck out of here. I'll call and I'll pay
Speaker 6:the tab tomorrow.
Speaker 4:Yeah. I'll come back and pay tomorrow. Yeah. But
Speaker 6:Well, let's go across
Speaker 4:the street. Lot of our friends and neighbors are on the spectrum of they're gonna drink through this, and it's fine. And so, like, we get all these texts like, there's six cops. Oh my god. Ashley got hit in the face.
Speaker 4:All this stuff is happening.
Speaker 6:Then Grateful for
Speaker 4:the And then, like Give
Speaker 5:me a refill.
Speaker 4:Two hours later, they're like, oh, everything's fine. Nothing. No big deal. I'm like, what the fuck? Well, like, delusional
Speaker 6:worried about.
Speaker 4:Yeah. Like, how delusional are you? And then everyone shut up and wouldn't talk about it for, like, two days.
Speaker 6:Bad for the information.
Speaker 4:Yeah. Well, we had to like we had to go to several sources because people like don't wanna like I don't know. I don't know what the or it's just like, oh, we were drunk and I don't even remember. Maybe maybe, you know, the guy had ranch dressing thrown on him and that was why he was mad. But I I don't care.
Speaker 4:Like, it's it's these this happens with all sorts of serious situations around here lately that I can like, off the top of my head.
Speaker 5:It's downplayed severely.
Speaker 4:Yeah. So let's get into the fourth of July.
Speaker 6:Downplayed severely. Wait. I just have a quick question on the ranch. Do you know why the ranch was thrown? I'm guessing she
Speaker 5:was carrying it, and it just happened to be convenient to throw at him. That would be my guess.
Speaker 4:No. I think it was something where the guy was, like, belligerent about asking for more ranch.
Speaker 6:He's desperate. Who? Who's what?
Speaker 4:Oh, Jordan. Hi, Jordan.
Speaker 5:Hey, Jordan.
Speaker 6:That makes you so happy.
Speaker 4:Yeah. Like, he probably was being a drunk idiot and was like, there's not enough fucking ranch.
Speaker 6:Thought it was.
Speaker 4:And she probably was like, here's your fucking ranch, you fucking asshole. Good for her.
Speaker 6:That's how you survive.
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Speaker 6:And I'm professor Elizabeth Benedict. In my class, we cover essential life skills, like how to talk your way into VIP with expired wristbands and how to hide a fireball in a beach chair.
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Speaker 5:Classes start every weekend. Enrollment is rolling like your cooler down the beach. Extra credit if you don't puke in your Uber.
Speaker 4:So, yeah, the fourth comes around.
Speaker 6:Start from the beginning.
Speaker 4:So at The parade was the beginning.
Speaker 5:Yeah. At 9AM, is it?
Speaker 6:Were there any festivities, like, before the fourth? Wait. The fourth was a Thursday?
Speaker 5:Thursday. So, yeah. No. So there was Wednesday at the Bird, which I did not go to, because I'm like, if we're gonna be partying all weekend, I do not need to be partying a fifth day for
Speaker 6:That was that heat wave too.
Speaker 5:Yeah. It was hot too, so I did not go to the music.
Speaker 6:You're trying to remember?
Speaker 4:Was it Jerry Clemens?
Speaker 5:I think it might have been.
Speaker 4:I probably went, but I didn't stay long because I was nervous about getting shot or punched in the face.
Speaker 6:Or ranch thrown on you.
Speaker 4:Yeah. Or get ranched. But I I took it easy, I think, Wednesday or may yeah. Mean, just my normal spectrum of alcoholism. And then it started with the parade, which is way too early, by the way.
Speaker 4:I'm just gonna put that out
Speaker 5:there. Nine. Nine. Although, with as hot as it was, it was probably a good thing that it wasn't.
Speaker 6:Yeah. Nine's very early.
Speaker 4:On a holiday? On a holiday, yeah. So, yeah,
Speaker 5:we went, we watched the parade for all twelve minutes. I returned some people with my golf cart, and then we went to a brunch at a friend's of ours, which was very nice. It was a good with as warm as it was, although it was unusually cool that morning, like, got a lot of cloud cover, so it wasn't severely hot. So we chilled there at the brunch, and about 03:00, we wandered down to the beach just in time for it to get super hot out. Like, all the clouds disembarked, and it was just like, here's your sun.
Speaker 6:Is 03:00 late?
Speaker 4:For us, usually. Yeah. On the fourth, I think, like, people are
Speaker 5:The beach was already somewhat full.
Speaker 6:Because typically, people like, set up early.
Speaker 4:Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
Speaker 5:It was people were setting, and I didn't care. I'm like, if I go down there and I can't find a spot, I will figure out something.
Speaker 4:Right. Which is odd for
Speaker 5:me, because usually I'm down there like,
Speaker 4:claiming real estate like some old West prospector. But yeah, it was not as so it kinda maybe it rained a tiny bit. Or it looked like it was gonna possibly rain. So I think that had a impact on the amount of people, because there was definitely less people on the beach this fourth
Speaker 5:than looked like it was going to rain, but it never hit. It was cloudy, thready.
Speaker 6:Tough the whole day?
Speaker 5:Till about it was cloudy ish from
Speaker 4:And then it just got fucking blazing hot.
Speaker 5:Yeah. As soon as the clouds partied at, like, four, everyone was in the water because it was just like, damn, it's hot out here. Like, it was 90 plus. So it's it's super hot, and it's like 04:30, 05:00. Dinner's Actually, it's later than that.
Speaker 5:Probably six because we went I went and fed the cats. We ate something real quick and then came back because we knew we were gonna be there late. So we get back, and no names will be mentioned. You know what you did. So one of our friends, recently out of college, brought
Speaker 4:Young. Young. Just of drinking age.
Speaker 5:Just of yes.
Speaker 6:Just So I know.
Speaker 5:Well, who it is. He brought his friend, and his friend got a little shootity schnooted. So he had the He did? His friend did. So the the person we don't know came to the beach and was very stumbly bumbly.
Speaker 5:Like, he was in the water and was doing, you know, the wobbly legs and the He's a real pasty fella. Yeah. He pro I'm amazed
Speaker 6:He's 21, though.
Speaker 5:Yes. They they were legal, but they didn't know how to drink. Guy's They're new.
Speaker 4:Tequila and vodka at like started at ten in the morning.
Speaker 5:Mix first of all, mixing tequila and vodka is a bad idea to begin with, regardless of what the temperature is. But on a 95 degree day on the beach yeah.
Speaker 6:So There is something not to derail this, but there is something to be said about people that know how to drink on the beach or in the summertime or whatever.
Speaker 5:It's a marathon.
Speaker 6:It's gift, I think. It's a gift. Like, when you when I would bring up people to Michigan, and you would know if they weren't they never went to a lake house. Like, to be able to pace yourself
Speaker 4:It's kinda like the dark arts.
Speaker 6:Sun. It is a dark art. That's a good I
Speaker 4:like that. Yeah. Like, if you're gonna draft somebody that's gonna drink on the beach, who's your number one pick?
Speaker 5:Oh, so like From here. The best drinker on the beach.
Speaker 6:Because it isn't art. I really do think so.
Speaker 5:So are we talking like someone we've never seen fucked up on the beach? Because we've all had those days where we've all had too much.
Speaker 6:Or they can still be fucked up, but but not destruct destructive.
Speaker 5:Yeah. Like, that takes out a lot of people.
Speaker 2:You know what
Speaker 6:I mean? Like oh, I see. Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 5:God. Who would I draft if I was, like, my number one beach drinker? Who would I take
Speaker 6:first over? Good.
Speaker 4:Alright. We're gonna get into that. Yeah. I think I think she's gotta be in the Yeah. Top.
Speaker 4:She's gotta be in the top.
Speaker 5:Because I've never seen her ever.
Speaker 4:Now that I think about
Speaker 5:it, I've never
Speaker 4:but I've I haven't seen her drunk at the beach or anywhere else.
Speaker 5:I've never I've never seen her
Speaker 6:She's
Speaker 5:hand. Up. Like, but she parties too. Like, it's not like she's not cocktailing or anything.
Speaker 6:So every side is
Speaker 4:eating. Kristen doughnuts.
Speaker 5:There you go.
Speaker 4:Kristen Kristen doughnuts. And we're gonna do a shout out to you as our one of our local heroes this week on the Miller Morning. Since we're
Speaker 5:in house. Like we said, our friend got Stumbly Bumbly.
Speaker 6:Uh-huh.
Speaker 5:And he started going down and we're like, you really need to get him taken care of. This is the warning sign. He's gonna be like
Speaker 6:And is the face doing?
Speaker 5:It was the face. It was the body motion. It was the lack of motor function. And we all told him like, you need to get him some water and you need to get off the beach like now because he's gonna be deadweight soon. Sure enough, all he did was cram watermelon down his face and a hot dog,
Speaker 4:which Jen I mean spent Jen pancakes spent three hours cutting up watermelon, and that kid just pounded it, and then, like, they were just using the Tupperware to pour water on him after he was unresponsive.
Speaker 6:No. Yes.
Speaker 5:He was non respite. It was so
Speaker 6:Was it concerning or funny?
Speaker 4:And then they tried to give the Tupperware back, and I'm like, just throw it in the garbage, please. I don't know.
Speaker 5:It was not it was not funny to begin with, because it's like, okay, one, you don't know, like, what you Get
Speaker 3:with it.
Speaker 5:Yeah. Like, be smarter about how you're drinking. And there was no real sense of caution, and then finally, we were like, You really need to either dial 911, or like seriously, because this is not getting anything
Speaker 6:a thing at that point.
Speaker 5:Yeah. We were cons like, not adults if he was like if it was 60 if it was a day like today where it's like 60 and he was drunk and be like, okay, like, he's not gonna die, but the heat. So then someone called Kristen Donuts. She went over, took a look at him,
Speaker 4:and she's like, she's in her bikini like, this is the thing. She's in her bikini. Bikini all day. Fourth of July bikini, and, like, she's like, I I was coming back to, like, feed the cats, and she's buzzing by on her on her golf cart to get a yeah. To get, like like, it's a ambulance or whatever and to pick up IVs.
Speaker 5:IVs. Yeah.
Speaker 4:For this poor kid. And so
Speaker 5:We can laugh about it now, but anyway, like
Speaker 4:I know. Like, so all of us are like, Yeah. Somebody should call 91 And like, this is a dangerous situation.
Speaker 5:Yeah. Kristen Donuts goes to get lifesaving IP. IVs. IVs. So comes back, pumps this kid full of fluids in one bag, pumps a second bag at
Speaker 4:Well, also, Christina assisting
Speaker 5:was backup.
Speaker 4:Also, shout out Shout out to Hero. Christina. Woah. She's a d too. Donut.
Speaker 4:Donette? Donette. Christina Donette. I don't know.
Speaker 6:Really confusing. Kristen. Christina. Donut. Well,
Speaker 4:let's keep it confusing. Yeah.
Speaker 6:Okay.
Speaker 4:Kristen donuts and but, yeah, they pumped this kid full of three I three full I don't know if it
Speaker 5:was three full, but it was it went into a third bag. I don't think the third bag fully got empty, but those are that's like 48 or 40 ounces of no.
Speaker 6:Was it free?
Speaker 5:Well
Speaker 4:Well, so that's the other thing. So the one of our other friends, who is kind of like, I don't know if he's a stepdad too. Technically. Technically. Yeah.
Speaker 4:Said, well, I'm gonna get them like a gift certificate for helping him, like $50 or whatever. I'm like,
Speaker 5:Gianna and no.
Speaker 4:Yeah. He was gonna get a gift certificate for Kristen, and he's he's like, yeah, like $50, maybe like Starbucks or whatever. I'm like, those IVs are like a $100 apiece. You better, like, just give her a check for $500. That's what you should do because she saved that kid.
Speaker 5:Oh, yeah. And the the so the kicker of the story too is like or like, how is he gonna be tomorrow? And she's like, he's not in a field thing. Because like the IV, like
Speaker 4:Well, she also asked when he could start drinking again, which I thought was
Speaker 6:very Who asked that?
Speaker 5:The friends asked that. Yeah. Not I was like,
Speaker 4:well said he's gonna wanna drink again. And I said, you know what he should do?
Speaker 5:Go home.
Speaker 4:No. I said, he should go to fucking church. Find Jesus. Find the church, take them there tomorrow, and tell them you should thank the Lord that you didn't die, and thank these hot bikini ladies. Like, could you imagine if you were a kid, and like, these hot ladies are giving you IVs, and you're dying?
Speaker 5:It's definitely like, in a more or less more or less serious, it's definitely the start to a porno.
Speaker 4:Right? Like, it's like, what the fuck in what world that are these nurses in bikinis doing IVs on the beach? On July 4. It's Miller Beach.
Speaker 6:I don't remember
Speaker 4:that. That's what world you're in. Because if you ever see I I don't know that I've ever seen someone getting an IV on the beach.
Speaker 5:No. Because it doesn't happen, Fury. Like, of all the This should not I mean, thank God he's okay. This should not have gone down like it did. But, yeah, like, no one
Speaker 6:You were lucky.
Speaker 5:No one was overly worried. Like, we were
Speaker 6:No, talk about that.
Speaker 5:There was concern in our group, and Mrs. Scramble was kind of eg egging
Speaker 4:on like this. She was very concerned. I was also concerned.
Speaker 5:My issue was once you start helping, you can't stop. Like, liability wise, you can't and I'm like, I'm not touching that with a 10 foot pole.
Speaker 6:That's a good point.
Speaker 4:And I didn't wanna go over there because if, like, he would have puked, I would have puked, and
Speaker 5:then like, ruin your lifeguard. So I was lifeguard certified when I was in high school, and they tell you, the bystander law says that you do I mean, if you're on duty, if like you're walking down the street and someone's having a heart attack, you don't have to do jack shit. You can sit there and watch him die. But if you decide to start helping
Speaker 6:Right.
Speaker 5:You cannot stop until professionals show up or they're revived. Like, you can't just be like, oh, well, I I gave him three pumps and a breath. He didn't make it, so I just walked away. You can't do that.
Speaker 4:Well, if he died, there would be no witnesses. Anyway. But yeah, there were a lot of witnesses to this. And I'm gonna tell you, again, going back to this alcohol spectrum situation, like, did it ruin anyone's day is what you asked. Right?
Speaker 4:Yeah. No. Not at all. Not at all.
Speaker 6:That's amazing.
Speaker 5:Everyone just kinda asks, is that kid okay? And then like, oh, okay. Cool. Where are the fireworks?
Speaker 4:I I
Speaker 6:don't know how to take that.
Speaker 4:I think if he would have died, that no one would have no. No one would have given a shit. They still would have wanted the the fireworks.
Speaker 6:Pluck this situation out of that and put it somewhere else. Right?
Speaker 5:Like, if it's happened in Valpo?
Speaker 6:Anywhere. Like, at home. Frankfurt, Michigan. Sure. Or like, if you saw a guy getting an IV,
Speaker 5:you know Well, also, the Fed I think a couple factors. One, there were not a lot of out of towners in town because the cloud scared them off. There was no official authorities down. Like, no one saw a cop or an ambulance or like someone in an EMT, so that was also in
Speaker 4:There was a cop that threatened to get involved, apparently.
Speaker 5:Yes. Which I'm not even to save the innocent and those, I'm not gonna we're not gonna go down there. But yes, the cops were around, but pretty much, like, by the time it was gonna get serious
Speaker 4:He was IV'd
Speaker 5:already. Yeah. IV Ivan.
Speaker 6:So it was was it
Speaker 4:like name him. He's not listening. Well, fuck him anyway. Like, I don't want him Don't come back here if you until you learn how to drink.
Speaker 5:I Well, no. Yeah. That's what I said. Like, don't bring
Speaker 6:Or maybe this is how you learn.
Speaker 4:Well, you don't learn. You don't learn. Okay. So No. I don't know.
Speaker 4:I'm I'm in t alright. So I'm in t ball. Do and I'm a little kindergartner, and do I go and face a major league pitcher
Speaker 6:Good point.
Speaker 4:That throws a 100 miles an hour? No. I don't fucking do You you're you're gonna have a tea for me to hit off of, which is like a high noon or whatever. You get to have that. That's going back to these teenagers drinking.
Speaker 4:They're like, I have never
Speaker 5:We're here.
Speaker 4:In my life thought that anyone would I would see anyone shotgun a Twisted Tea, but I've seen it. I seen it, I hate it. Don't wanna ever see it again. It's not even carbonated.
Speaker 5:Who shotguns? Who well, twisted tea.
Speaker 4:My niece and her boyfriend Oh. Shotgun the twisted tea, and they call them Tweez or some shit. Here's the thing now. Shortened.
Speaker 5:I don't like it. If you're gonna drink tea with booze, there's way better ways to do it because twisted Tea's got a weird
Speaker 4:But it's not carbonated. There's no effect of the shotgun. There's no need
Speaker 5:to shut it.
Speaker 4:You can just drink it down, like, from the hole.
Speaker 6:There's nothing impressive about it.
Speaker 5:No. It doesn't. That was the, like, that was the reason you would shotgun a beer is because it's carbonated. So you had to, like,
Speaker 4:wait and eat their mouths.
Speaker 6:Thing, but now I totally see what you're saying. That that did make
Speaker 5:so shotgunning Twisted Tea's.
Speaker 4:Man, I was so I'm still so mad about this. Like, learn how to drink. But, yeah, like, this kid is not coming to the pro like, the July 4, Miller Beach is pro. It's an all star game.
Speaker 6:But maybe but that's the thing is,
Speaker 5:like this yeah. This kid, up up in the fourth inning, Randy Johnson's got a no hair going.
Speaker 4:Here he goes. For tequila on top of the vodka at eleven in the morning. It's 95 degrees in Miller Beach.
Speaker 5:Well, that was one of
Speaker 4:the first comments made is
Speaker 5:like, this is and I think you might have said it like, this is a all star, like, hall of fame level day. Like, you can't be bringing that amateur bullshit.
Speaker 4:No. You gotta know your limits. You gotta start maybe with some water, you know, maybe even wait till the fireworks start to get
Speaker 5:Even even the pros, even weed, switch out, bring water, like, you can't do
Speaker 4:was the of doing like mostly water, but a little bit of vodka lemonade, but most like, it was pretty watered down is what I did.
Speaker 5:And you gotta spend some yeah, gotta cool down. Some keys. So to become a better beach drinker.
Speaker 4:To become a better Miller Beach Always
Speaker 5:keep your core temperature down. So if you're at the beach and you are drinking, once in a while, just go in the water, sink down, get the neck level, let the cold water get your head under
Speaker 4:your body.
Speaker 6:Touch base with your body.
Speaker 5:Well, don't don't touch your base with your body too much because that's illegal going on, unless you have a fuck shed. If you have a portable fuck shed, then you can do all you want.
Speaker 4:There were no fuck sheds on the beach this year.
Speaker 5:There were fuck tents that no one took down at nighttime, which made no fucking sense.
Speaker 4:So last year, there was this, like, I don't know if it was like a changing station or whatever, but it looked like there were people going in there and fucking. It was like a little tent or shed
Speaker 5:or whatever. It looked like a portable outhouse. Yeah. That was weird.
Speaker 4:But no no sight of those this year. Okay. No boats. Not really a lot of boats. That was nice.
Speaker 4:No. The the cops actually did a really good job, like
Speaker 6:Yeah. Good.
Speaker 4:Clearing the beach where they were doing the fireworks and clearing out the boats. No like, not 50 different speakers. Although,
Speaker 3:there was
Speaker 4:one of our neighbors trying to even though there was a huge sound system, he's really proud of his music and it's like a menagerie of trash, like like fucking country and hip hop and like zero taste.
Speaker 5:Checked out. Yeah. Whatever. Reggae. It was an interesting mix.
Speaker 4:And, you know, he was trying to get it going, but at some point, someone was like, shut your fucking speaker off.
Speaker 6:Yeah. No.
Speaker 4:And yeah. Like, so that I don't under I'll never understand. Like, why do people want other people to hear their music?
Speaker 6:The I'm the complete opposite. I don't know.
Speaker 5:That you want everyone to hear your music?
Speaker 6:I don't. Like like
Speaker 5:Oh, yeah. So when I walked down and I heard music, I'm like, there's already some fucking boater asshole down there blaring, and then I
Speaker 4:walked down, I'm like, oh, no. It's just the
Speaker 5:one they're gonna use for the show later, I guess. But, yeah, like, to me, like, we can all listen to our own music. You don't have to blare it
Speaker 6:for everyone bad music than to music.
Speaker 5:Oh, yeah. By yeah. What hearing, like, good music drowned Yeah. Out with
Speaker 4:Yeah.
Speaker 6:Not. Yeah. It's not good.
Speaker 4:It's annoying. Like, I didn't come down
Speaker 5:here to listen to your bullshit, or your bullshit music. So But, yeah, the fireworks were decent.
Speaker 4:There were some big lags in
Speaker 5:the show, which was kinda weird.
Speaker 4:So so yeah. The fireworks, I had went into Jose, thank you for the fireworks. Great job. Appreciate it.
Speaker 6:Does he set them off?
Speaker 4:Yes. I don't I think he set them off this year, which good thing he didn't blow anything off. I mean, or, like, any limbs or anything because he can't afford to lose, like, any height. Well, I mean
Speaker 5:well, even if he blows his legs off, he's only gonna be, like, two inches shorter. I mean, he's he's not a tall man.
Speaker 4:But he did a it it was a well organized. I think part of the problem with the fireworks were that, so I went in, I saw them in the garage there Mhmm. Before they set them off.
Speaker 6:That's cool.
Speaker 4:And the fireworks on the box said, Trump is your president. And then In case anyone underneath it, it said, made in China. So, like, it was very it was very Jerry's got That was what the fireworks named were named. Trump is your president.
Speaker 6:That's funny.
Speaker 4:Yeah. Right? Like, what the fuck, man? Is that
Speaker 6:ironic, or is that like a That's
Speaker 4:kind It's kind of
Speaker 5:Like, we all know that the fireworks come from China, but
Speaker 4:it's just kinda funny that Trump Trump is your president. Like, duh. Like, is that just a I slick marketing
Speaker 5:think
Speaker 6:it's cute. I think it's cute.
Speaker 5:Well, I mean, if you're trying to sell fireworks, that's gonna that's gonna
Speaker 4:be the market. MAGA is your target market for fireworks for sure because I am not.
Speaker 6:I'm taking the complete opposite take. Like, Trump is your it's like a it's funny. It's like,
Speaker 4:Yeah. And they did blow up, like, out of his face too. So, like, it completely
Speaker 6:not wait.
Speaker 4:No. It had his mouth, and then it had, like, a tube.
Speaker 5:So it's like a blow up to all of the Yeah.
Speaker 6:I didn't that. You didn't see that.
Speaker 4:Yeah. Like, it had a picture of him on the actual fireworks, and then they came out of his mouth.
Speaker 6:Do you have a picture of that?
Speaker 4:Well Somewhere. Yeah.
Speaker 5:We do. We will post it
Speaker 4:to We'll put it in the show notes.
Speaker 5:And we'll put it on the show notes or our Instagram.
Speaker 4:Yeah. So like, just like blew out of his mouth. And I think he had some super cool ones that I've never seen before that like shot horizontally over the water and then went up.
Speaker 5:So
Speaker 4:They were they were amazing. And they look like fireballs landed in the lake. So Definitely pollution.
Speaker 5:There were
Speaker 6:Drunk people putting these off, it makes me sad.
Speaker 5:Well, worried me because there were people in the water when he lit that water. Yeah. And I wanted to, like
Speaker 4:And there's these huge fireballs falling into the lake. They were like on fire. So like, it was crazy.
Speaker 5:Like, it looked like an accident at first, and then you see like all of a sudden
Speaker 4:Yeah. They like went up like missiles. They went horizontal, and then they went up, and then they fell down as balls of fire.
Speaker 6:They should do a barge next year.
Speaker 4:Firework barge?
Speaker 5:That's not what professionals do it. It costs a lot of money.
Speaker 6:Well, no. You can just you can
Speaker 4:just I mean, we just got buoys in, and it's almost the July. I
Speaker 5:used to say like
Speaker 6:could find someone with a boat, and you could like
Speaker 5:Do you have access to a barge? No. More expensive than you think.
Speaker 6:Sure it is.
Speaker 4:It probably takes a lot of gas.
Speaker 5:Not well, you gotta push the thing. I mean, the barge itself doesn't. It's just a big giant water couch.
Speaker 6:So they were good. So there were some going straight out into the water.
Speaker 5:They were just the one. It was just the one shotty. Yeah. There were but there was fireworks all the way up and down the beach. So it wasn't just our group.
Speaker 5:It was another group. Then you could see Ogden Dunes, they were doing theirs. I mean, had we not had the Ivy Ivan situation, it probably would have been a lot more like patriotic, I guess, and fun, but
Speaker 4:I don't know about patriotic.
Speaker 5:I mean
Speaker 4:Maybe more like a funeral is what I thought. But
Speaker 5:but that was kind of fourth of July, and then I, like, I saw the finale on the way in because I after the well, I'm like, oh, they must be done. And then, like, I'm not turning around at this point. Once I head up that beach with all my shit, I am not turning around.
Speaker 6:Oh, okay. So that was my next question.
Speaker 5:Oh, yeah.
Speaker 6:When the fireworks start, is that like you're sitting, watching, then you leave? Or like, what's the
Speaker 5:Or is I it like
Speaker 4:mean, I think it was kinda buggy.
Speaker 5:It was buggy. Like, the wind stops of the gnats were kinda like, I was deep woods offed, and I'm like, didn't have any more in me.
Speaker 4:I'm sure there were some lunatics that started fires on the beach or
Speaker 5:was a bomb that I could verify because I saw a fire already going. Yeah.
Speaker 6:Okay.
Speaker 4:Someone almost caught the dune on fire, and the cops like ended up putting it out.
Speaker 5:I didn't see that. Yeah. It was
Speaker 6:Was it beach fire?
Speaker 4:No. It like one of the fireworks up the beach toward maybe Park. Oh,
Speaker 5:okay. Yeah. So you like
Speaker 4:Like, got two like, somebody launched one into the dunes, they they ended up putting it out. But but, yeah, there was probably beach fires, you know, because a lot of people like to do that. Not me. I mean, it wasn't because even me, I this is the first time I've ever stayed down there the whole for the whole time.
Speaker 5:Well, also, to speak about drinking professionals, we started at 9AM, and it was ten. Like, that's a solid thirteen hours of drinking. Like,
Speaker 4:I I couldn't find so by the time I came up, I could not find the beach path. So that's how, like, dark it
Speaker 5:gets. Wow. Well, it
Speaker 4:was also I wasn't drunk, but
Speaker 5:it was It was clear, and I don't think there I think it was a new moon.
Speaker 4:Yeah. I couldn't like, I couldn't see where the beach path was, and I ended up like following somebody else. But Alright, folks. That's it for today's episode of the Miller morning madhouse. Big thanks to our sponsors, So Cool Shirts, where bad decisions become great fashion.
Speaker 4:Check them out for your next questionable t shirt. And don't forget, I'll ingest trivia with Josh Scramble hosted at the Marshall j Gardner Center. It's the only trivia night where the questions are just as unpredictable as the answers. Join us if you dare. And a shout out to the Miller Community Theater, also at the Marshall j Gardner Center, where the local stars shine bright.
Speaker 4:Big thanks to the MBACD for hosting these awesome events and making Miller Beach the place to be. Thanks for hanging out with us, Miller Beach. We will be back next Sunday, hopefully, with a brand new episode. That is if we are not too hungover. No promises, But stay cool, stay crazy, and keep supporting the madhouse.
Speaker 4:Catch you next time.
Speaker 1:All you guys do is just sit up
Speaker 2:there and talk about how fucking cool you are.
Speaker 4:Bam's a bam. What's a bam?
Speaker 5:Well, you wouldn't even know.
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